


Connection

by clockwork_spider



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Gen, Platonic Soulmates, Sentimental, TYL universe, sunk-cost fallacy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-06
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-31 13:48:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6472468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockwork_spider/pseuds/clockwork_spider
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>TYL verse. About Spanner’s view of Shouichi while Shouichi was undercover at Millefiore.</p><p>  <i>Suppose you have a friend, a close friend. You thought you knew him well, and you enjoyed his company.</i></p><p>  <i>But recently, you found out that he’s planning to do something very wrong that would definitely be very bad for everyone else around him.</i></p><p>  <i>And you realize, perhaps you don’t know him that well after all.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Connection

**Author's Note:**

> This is a non-romantic soulmate AU. Soulmates are people who are most likely to have a mutual understanding of one another. 

Spanner had never cared much for other people.

It’s not as cold as it sounds, really. He had friends, people he spoke with, people he admired. He had people who appreciated him, and he enjoyed being appreciated. He didn’t particularly dislike other people. However, he never really felt the need to connect with other human beings on an emotional level, nor did he ever crave to be understood by others. Spanner accepted people as separate entities, he was comfortable with this idea. Friendship was not a necessity to Spanner’s life.

When Spanner was 16, he met his soulmate.

Soulmates, an almost mythical concept, widely accepted by the general public as something that just _is_. Like the fact that the sky is blue, or the fact that gravitational pull exist. Research have been done on soulmates, yielding inconsistent results.

The most recent public census shows that 21.4% of the population identified their soulmate as their romantic partner. 73.5% identified their soulmate as their friend, however, only 33.9% identified their soulmate as a close friend. 2.3% of the population identified their soulmate as their competitor and/or opposition. However, if you looked to people holding high position of power, particularly in politics or business, that percentage rose to a 68%.

* * *

 

The common consensus, though it lacked any empirical evidence, concluded that soulmates were people who were most likely to share a mutual understanding. Of course, this meant that it wasn’t uncommon for soulmarks to disappear as people changed.

Spanner never felt the need to share a mutual understanding with another human being, though he admit the concept was fascinating.

“Hello, my name is Irie Shouichi, ah- sorry, I meant Shouichi Irie. Excuse my English,” said the winner of the robotics competition, with an extended hand and a heavy Japanese accent, “your mini-mosca is very impressive.”

“Spanner,” he shook the redhead’s hand.

And then it happened, a mark, one that looked like a cross with a few screws in them, appeared on Shouichi’s neck. An “S” was situated in the middle of the cross.

Judging from Shouichi’s reaction, the same mark must have appeared on Spanner’s own neck.

“I guess it’s nice that our name starts with the same letter, well… when you write mine in English, anyway,” Shouichi adverted his gaze, a little awkwardly.

“Yeah,” Spanner answered, he didn’t know why, but he felt like he had to laugh.

Shouichi laughed as well, in symmetry. It wasn’t a bad introduction.

“Spanner, that is a very interesting name,” Shouichi remarked, “ah, excuse me, don’t mean to be rude."

“Thanks, I thought it is fitting for me,” Spanner said, in awkward Japanese. He grinned proudly as Shouichi’s eyes widened in surprise. “Your name very good too, Shouichi-kun."

“Thanks, but it’s a very common name in Japan,” Shouichi answered, in Japanese.

“That is fine,” Spanner nodded, "I like Japanese things.”

* * *

 

Statistically, it was very likely for one to get along with one’s soulmate. Spanner and Shouichi were not statistical outliers.

Shouichi’s English was improving, as was Spanner’s Japanese.

* * *

 

They were offered scholarship at different universities. They kept in contact, though they’ve been talking a lot less since they both got busy with schoolwork.

They were never close. Spanner figured that they must have both changed a lot as individual persons by now. Yet the soulmark stubbornly remained, a single “S” in the middle of a mechanical cross.

On the public census, Spanner bubbled in “friends” on the question about his relationship with his soulmate.

* * *

 

> **_Spanner, can I ask you a personal question?_ **

Shouichi asked, one day, out of the blues, over a Skype message.

He hesitated, Shouichi didn’t ask personal questions. It was how their friendship worked. They spoke about research and mechanics and anime and exchanged cultural trivias. They discuss the future of mechanical engineering. By some point, from bits and tangents in their conversation, they’d learn personal facts about one another. He learnt that Shouichi had two sisters, and he learnt that Shouichi was enamoured with a certain friend named Byakuran, whom Shouichi met in university.

They didn’t start conversations about personal matters.

Self-help pamphlets often advises that one’s soulmate often gave the best counsel. The logic goes like this. Soulmates are people who are internally similar to you. They would have the best understanding of your perspective. Furthermore, they are likely going to give you advices you’d give to yourself if you’re seeing your situation from a third person perspective. Thus, you’re more likely to agree with them in retrospect.

One cannot say that a soulmate’s counsel is objectively more trustworthy just because you’re more likely to agree with it in retrospect. But it would definitely make one feel better.

Spanner did not wish to become a source of counsel. Truth be told, he had no confidence on his own emotional intelligence. However, it was obvious that his friend had been on the edge lately. Shouichi was a friend whose company Spanner enjoyed, and Spanner felt that Shouichi’s well being was important to him. Thus, he had a responsibility to do everything in his power to relieve his friend of his troubles.

> **You may**
> 
> **I will try to answer to the best of my abilities**
> 
> **I can not guarantee it would be good counsel**

Spanner decided to settle with a disclaimer.

> **_Noted_ **
> 
> **_Thanks, Spanner_ **
> 
> **_I appreciate it_ **

Shouichi responded. There was a long period of silence as Shouichi typed out his problem. No doubt composing and erasing it several times.

> **_Suppose you have a friend, a close friend. You thought you knew him well, and you enjoy his company_ **
> 
> **_But recently, you found out that he’s planning to do something very wrong that would definitely be very bad for everyone else around him_ **
> 
> **_And you realize, perhaps you don’t know him that well after all_ **
> 
> **_However, knowing his nature, you can’t stop him without taking drastic measures. Not only will you lose him as a friend, you may also put yourself in danger_ **
> 
> **_You remember the good times you had with him, and you wonder whether it’s worth it_ **
> 
> **_Um… yeah_ **
> 
> **_would you betray a friend if you think what they’re going to do is wrong?_ **

_What on earth is Shouichi going through?_ Spanner must admit, he felt somewhat alarmed by this confession.

> **Okay**

Spanner suppose if Shouichi wanted to share more, he would have. Shouichi was a very secretive person, and pushing people to share things wasn’t Spanner’s style.

> **I don’t want you to put yourself in danger**
> 
> **This is too complicated. I will just tell you what I would do**
> 
> **I don’t think I’m the type of person who would break my principles for the sake of friendship**
> 
> **If what my friend is doing is wrong, I would definitely stop him**
> 
> **However, if there is someone else more qualified to stop him than I am, I would leave it to them instead of putting myself in danger**
> 
> **But it seems like your mind is already made up**
> 
> **I need to ask you something, though**
> 
> **You mentioned remembering the good times**
> 
> **Do you still feel like you can see him the same way after knowing that he’ll do something terrible?**

There was a pause.

> **_No_ **
> 
> **_I can’t help but feel like the guy I knew was a lie_ **
> 
> **_I still think he’s cool, but I can’t see him the same way anymore_ **

Shouichi answered.

> **Okay, then this is kind of like a case of sunk-cost fallacy**
> 
> **You feel bad because you’ve already invested a lot in this friend of yours**
> 
> **You feel like you’ll lose his friendship if you betray him**
> 
> **But in reality, the friendship is already lost, because you can’t see him the same way anymore**
> 
> **So there’s no reason to hesitate. Because no matter how much you use to enjoy his company, you can never get it back now**

There was a long period of silence after Spanner’s answer, which made him nervous. He didn’t realize his hands were getting cold.

> **_I see_ **

Shouichi finally answered, after an entire song finished playing on Spanner’s playlist. 

> **_Thanks a lot, Spanner_ **
> 
> **_That was very helpful_ **
> 
> **_I never thought of it that way._ **

Spanner wasn’t sure whether he was actually helpful. Still, he typed

> **I’m glad to be of help**

**Shouichi, if you ever need someone to talk to** he started, after a moment, he pressed ctrl+A, and Delete. It wasn’t a responsibility Spanner felt he had any right to take on.

That was the last in-depth conversation Spanner ever had with Shouichi, until they met again at the Melone base.

* * *

 

He was 24 when he started working for the mafia. It was an easy decision. They were interested in his research, and wanted to fund him. In return, he was to build weapons for them. It was blood money. Spanner didn’t mind. He wanted to push the limits of robotics, it didn’t much matter how. To sweeten the deal, the Millefiore family even offered research data on the ever mysterious dying will flame. Spanner could only imagine the possibilities of flame powered Moscas.

A colleague in the biological engineering program, Iris Hepburn, already accepted the offer.

Spanner was a man of few principles. He enjoyed creating beautiful things, wondrous machines that pushed the limits of technology, and he’d take any opportunity to keep creating. Millefiore offered him this opportunity.

Really, aside from that, Spanner’s morals were rather flexible.

The soulmark on his neck never faded. He remembered his last conversation with Shouichi.

> **If what my friend is doing is wrong, I would definitely stop him.**

He wondered whether Shouichi would approve of his decision to work for the mafia.

He didn’t have to wonder for long.

On his first day at the Melone base, he met his new commander.

“Spanner?” Shouichi looked surprised, like he didn’t expect to see his friend there. Spanner wasn’t expecting to see Shouichi either.

There was a moment of tense silence. How much had Shouichi changed since they last spoke, Spanner wondered.

“Oh thank god,” Shouichi smiled, nervous, a hand on his neck, covering where the mechanical cross lied, “I was worried that I wouldn’t know anyone here. I’m glad to see at least one familiar face.”

And that was it, it was the same old Shouichi, but as a top ranking commander of Millefiore. There was something disconcerting about that.

* * *

 

“It’s all for the sake of Byakuran-san. The 7^3 Policy,” Shouichi explained, in flat monotone, “We need to collect the Vongola rings, the Mare rings, and the Arcobaleno pacifiers, so Byakuran-san can destroy and remake the world.”

“Is Byakuran-san that important to you?” Spanner asked. It was out of place. To question the authority of the Don could spell his death sentence. It didn’t matter though, he was in private, with a friend.

“You will not question Byakuran-san’s authority, Spanner,” his friend warned, coldly, “you may be my friend, but Byakuran-san’s powers are absolute. I am his right-hand man, and I will do anything to see his will realized.”

“Even if it meant destroying the world?”

“Yes,” Shouichi’s expression was unreadable.

“I see,” Spanner answered, and didn’t press the matter any further.

_It didn’t make sense._

“All for the sake of Byakuran” was a statement completely incompatible with Spanner’s mental model of Irie Shouichi. The Shouichi which Spanner knew was someone who stubbornly held onto his own values. If Shouichi was willing to destroy the world, it would have been for his own reasons, and not for the sake of anyone else. It was as if he was speaking to someone else in the skin of his old friend.

Had Byakuran fundamentally altered Shouichi in the past three years?

Spanner could not see Shouichi’s soulmark with the high collar of the Millefiore uniform, but his own was still there, indicating that they were still soulmates, that neither of them had changed fundamentally in a way that they’re no longer able to understand one another.

Is Shouichi trying to tell him something?

Spanner didn’t feel like he understood Shouichi anymore.

> **_Suppose you have a friend, a close friend. You thought you knew him well, and you enjoy his company._ **
> 
> **_But recently, you found out that he’s planning to do something very wrong that would definitely be very bad for everyone else around him._ **
> 
> **_And you realize, perhaps you don’t know him that well after all._ **

Had Spanner ever truly known the man he called a friend?

* * *

 

Loyalty was not a character Spanner valued. Spanner had decided, long ago, that he would only commit himself to his pride as a mechanic. His work was his resolution. He did not feel the need to commit himself to any greater power than his desire for knowledge.

So when Vongola the 10th showed up, with his brilliant X-burner, Spanner wanted to see it completed.

It wasn't a betrayal. Shouichi should understand, that neither their soulmark nor their friendship bounded Spanner to any oath of loyalty.

Besides, the Shouichi Spanner knew would have expected Spanner to stop him.

> **If what my friend is doing is wrong, I would definitely stop him.**

He gave his words, after all.

So Spanner became a traitor to Millefiore, and Shouichi granted his subordinates the permission to take Spanner's life.

* * *

 

When they met again, it all _made sense_.

* * *

 

"You know, I'm so glad," Shouichi said, as they worked on the new Vongola base for Choice, "I knew you would make the right decision, Spanner."

"You trusted me to abandon you for Vongola 10th," Spanner stated. It wasn't a question, but an incomplete statement that hung in the air.

Shouichi hesitated.

"I trusted the Spanner that I knew, a man true to his own principles."

"It didn't feel very good, though, thinking of you as my enemy," Spanner stated, not in a particularly accusatory manner.

"I know," Shouichi paused from his work, turned to face him, "I'm sorry."

There was a tremor in Shouichi's voice. His shoulders hunched. He was wearing an expression Spanner found hard to decipher. He looked... Tired.

> **_So Byakuran and I came up with this new game called Choice_ **

Spanner remembered the many enthusiastic messages.

> **_it was a boardgame but now we're programming it_ **
> 
> **_I'll send it to you when I'm done B)_ **

Perhaps Shouichi have felt that way for the past four years.

Spanner felt like he could understand Shouichi a little better then.

> **Shouichi, if you ever need someone to talk to**

He wondered if it would had made a difference if he had pressed "send".

"It's alright. I'm here now," Spanner offered.

Shouichi stared. His expression was, once again, unreadable.

"I'm glad," he smiled, his voice sounded a bit strangled, "I'm so glad you're still here."

Spanner had never experienced loneliness, or felt the need to connect to anyone on a personal level. It never mattered to him, whether he would ever be understood. It never mattered to him that he had a soulmate. But to have a friend who trusted him, who understood him, it was not a bad feeling.

Perhaps Spanner could become someone for his friend to rely on.

"Yeah," Spanner answered, "me too."

**Author's Note:**

> I always felt that Spanner and Shouichi are friends who truly understood one another. They enjoy each other’s company, but they probably won’t die for one another. And that’s what I feel make their friendship more relatable. I can see myself having friends like that. 
> 
> In retrospect, the soulmate aspect was probably negligible. But I truly feel like they’re a good definition of what I feel soulmates should be, so I kept it. 


End file.
